Metallica, behind the times, and late to the party… big surprise.

Metallica, late to the party as usual…

I got into Metallica with the “Black” album, and then migrated backwards to the beginning as I could afford to buy more music.  Honestly, Napster didn’t mean much to me – when it got shut down, I didn’t lose sleep.  Lar’s stance on it?  Hypocritical considering their history – but I digress.

I don’t listen to Metallica anymore unless it is pre St.Anger.  I can handle the evolution of an act, including the arrogant poncey pandering of their dickless drummer and subsequent live therapy sessions.  St.Anger sucked.  The only time I found any enjoyment from a track on that album was during an episode of Smallville where Clark Kent robbed a bank.

But that was Smallville.  Metal heads generally don’t watch WB shows.  It didn’t fit.  St.Anger didn’t fit in the catalog or the progression of Metallica over the years.  It sucked.  I listened to the disc maybe 4 times trying to find some redeeming value to it, but it’s true – play every album Metallica has ever recorded from the last to the first, and you will find yourself increasingly amazed at how far they’ve fallen.

I’m glad they’ve finally woken up to the possibilities that online distribution has offered them – but they’re still a gaggle of hypocrites whose last record was an unequivocal stinker.  Michael Stipe from REM could have written, produced, and performed a better metal record than Metallica did with St.Anger.

So that said, Lars, you poncey little prick – lose the kettle drum, get everyone drunk, and give me a real metal record worthy of the Metallica moniker – and I’ll buy it.  Others will too, as the music is still louder than you are.

If we get another St.Anger, do us all a favor and retire.  No amount of lawsuits will ever get your coffers as full as they were before you forgot how to be Metallica.

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