To The Metal

Finally finished watching House of Wax. I had started to watch it a a few nights back when I first picked it up, and had only watched about 30 minutes of it until it annoyed me enough to shut it off. The best way to describe House of Wax, is that it is stupid, predictable, and completely BLOWS until people start getting killed. Then at least it is entertaining. If you can make it up to the first person dies, the rest of the movie is fast paced and worth watching. There is some farely gruesome shit… But just the same, the bar was raised by House of 1,000 Corpses and Devils Rejects. Anything else has one hell of a hard time keeping up. If they some how work out a sequel from this, piece of advice, don’t write the characters so fucking stupid and if you’re going to have two extremely hot chicks in it…MAKE THEM LOSE THEIR CLOTHING BEFORE THEY DIE.

I really hope the French do everything they can to ensure that diplomacy will conquer the violence engulfing their cities.

Paris Riots Spread to 20 Suburbs

Either that, or maybe they’ll be able to contain them long enough so they run out of cars and buildings to burn down…

When I heard that George Carlin was going to have another HBO special, I was definitely looking forward to it. What can I say, his brand of humor always cracked me up.

Well folks, the first part of his LIVE rant covered suicide. Personally I think…well, I think he should try it. Seriously. Coming from a guy who’s been there, I know the healing power of suicide.

It’s not that he’s lost his humor, no some of his jokes still evoke a chuckle… But he’s old, tired, and haggardly. Most of his jokes can be described the same way.

Best way to put it, he’s not just past his prime, his prime has been lapped, Hendrick Motorsports style. This guy showed up to the race and forgot his car.

In all seriousness, watching him perform is depressing. I recommend 1 of 2 things for ‘ol George… Take up a pen and start writing Op Ed’s in the New York Times or eat a bullet. Both will have a punch line worth a good laugh…at least the latter will be more entertaining then this HBO special.

Just get home, check my voicemail…

Voicemail spam. To my house line.

I think I need to get another telezapper.

So the other night I received an email from one of my readers which attempted to make the claim that the recent indictment of Scooter Libby and continuing investigation of Karl Rove was on the same level as Watergate, scandal wise. Even the subject of the email was “President Bush’s Watergate.”

So I read the article. I laughed. I watched the video, and laughed some more.

As I sat and read the quotes, observing the glee of investigating Karl Rove and indicting Scooter Libby… I scratched my head in confusion… Was there a point to this?

The video starts out with a montage of Richard M. Nixon and Watergate imagery. Then its first claim: “In 2003, “senior White House officials” leaked the name of an undercover CIA operative as part of a political smear campaign over Iraq intelligence.” Is this true? After two years of investigation, independent counsel Patrick Fitzgerald has yet to prove that crime of leaking even took place. So we have accusations of a crime with no evidence in alleged retaliation of the actions of Joe Wilson. Two years have passed and all they have done is indict Scooter Libby. Now I’m not downplaying the seriousness of this indictment one bit, however, if after 2 years of investigation you still have NO EVIDENCE that the crime you were investigating even took place…*cough* BULLSHIT?

“At the CIA’s Request, a Federal Investigation Was Launched.” So “the CIA believed there may have been a crime committed, and referred it to the Justice Department.” That’s from Joe Wilson’s mouth… Seemingly the only portion of the video backed up by fact.

Next, the video moves to an episode of Hardball with Chris Matthews where former RNC chair Ed Gillespie states “to reveal the identity of an undercover CIA operative is abhorrent, it should be a crime and it is a crime.” Then Chris Matthews chimes in… “That’d be worse than Watergate, wouldn’t it?”

Sorry folks, I always get misty at a birth, even if its just the birth of a really fucking lame talking point.

Who really knows? 2 years of investigating has provided no evidence. Joe Wilson himself has stated “She was not a clandestine officer at the time that that article in Vanity Fair appeared.” So she’s not undercover, even the former covert who was her boss Fred Rustmann stated that her neighbors and friends knew it. Anyone could have leaked it, and after 2 years not even independent counsel Patrick Fitzgerald knows who leaked it.

“President Bush promised to fire anybody involved.” True, he did in fact do that. It’s a shame nobody can prove who was involved after 2 years of investigating, not even independent counsel Patrick Fitzgerald. “…Yes, and thats up to the US Attorney to determine the facts,” Bush replies when questioned if he will still stand by his decision to fire anyone involved. I’m sure if Fitzgerald actually proved it, heads would roll. While the video hopes to use the fact nobody has been fired as a sign of weakness, to the rest of us, that is integrity.

The video continues…Ah yes, Rolling Stones music, montage…Libby INDICTED. Rove, UNDER INVESTIGATION. It’s a regular Left Wing Political ORGASM! ‘”The disclosure of Ms.Plame’s name was an unprecedented and shameful event in American history and, in our professional judgment, has damaged U.S. National security.” — 10 Former CIA officers in a Letter to Speaker Hastert.’

I agree fully, and the day they prove someone actually leaked it, I’m all for convicting the fuck out of them.

The video closes out with an 7 year old clip of George Sr…why? I bet it gave some Lib genuine chills… then the true gem:

“Had enough? Think Change. Think Democrat.”

Had enough? Can’t say I’ve had enough of baseless charges which are still unproven and lack any evidence that the crime even took place after 2 years of investigating. Every time the Left opens their mouth they end up choking on shoelaces.

Think Change? What, like the 8 years we were led by President Clinton and got to hear what Watergate sounded like with an ‘s’ on the end? Not fucking likely.

Think Democrat? Every fucking time I throw the lever towards another Republican victory.

Here’s a link to the video: http://www.dccc.org/video/libby_indicted.wmv

So far I’ve put in 2 requests to cancel my MySpace account and have gotten no-where. Apparently I am supposed to get a confirmation email to confirm my decision, as of yet I haven’t gotten anything and its a little annoying because I want out. It was fun while it lasted but I waste a little too much time there. Besides, I’m trying to cut the amount of technology I use in my off time, so every little bit helps.

Should be able to remove the cast off my hand and forearm the Monday after next. The sooner the better. My skin is dry and itchy, and I am allergic to just about every moisturizer on the market (glycerin). I can’t really wash the hand so the skin has steadily been drying up. Once the cast is off, I need to band the pinkie and index fingers together so to get them moving like they should again. Hopefully any rotational deviation is minimal so everything still works like it used to.

Went out to see Saw II yesterday, wasn’t better or worse than the first, I’d say it definitely ranks up there. All the fodder for Jigsaw is up to par, even when they start dropping. Still, one of the highlights that really carried the movie was:

Emmanuelle Vaugier

Who managed to keep her nipples popping out of her shirt in just about every scene. I’m shallow, I’ll admit it. Still, Saw 2 is never short on gore or suspense, another one of those films which seems to have a goal of evolving the horror genre which it does expertly while staying true to its roots.

Went to the Forest of Fear last night in Sterling Forest, what a fucking waste of time and money. $18 to get in, a few Carnie rides and games, and a 40 minute line to the lamest fucking hauntest house I’ve ever seen. Sure the sets were great, but the acting blew. They’d be well advised to contact the Castle Grill in Hamburg, NJ for a list of their previous Haunted Castle employees, might have a better chance of not just scaring the little girls. They had a smaller area which mainly consisted of a smoke filled maze. Didn’t scare me either. Mind you I appreciate a good scare, but for $18 I expect to at least get a chill beyond what the outside air caused.

Then this morning at 9:30am, FUCKING TELEMARKETER. I need to buy a new TeleZapper.

I’ve seen some pretty extreme, painful, and downright stupid videos on the Internet… This has to be one of the worst. Anyone know the story on it? What I know so far is that some dipstick was leaning out of the back seat of a moving car to smack a kid on a bike. He loses his balance and well, oncoming traffic ensures Karmic balance…

Watch the video!

Gonna try something new here, get some direct feedback from my readers. I always get a laugh when someone does something dumb, so if this works out, every week/month I will have a new post where I finish the line “The dumbest things you’ve done with…” add a few of my own, and leave the rest to you folks.

This week: The dumbest things you’ve done with… a car.

1. Put the car into neutral so I could avoid some bees, sent it hurtling through 2 neighbors yards and a fence before it parked in a tree.
2. Tried to pull a 180, instead hung a 90 into a yield sign trying to show off to my buddy in his Taurus.
3. Took my ’86 Buick Turbo for a spin without registration or insurance, lost the brakes at 85mph and made it into my driveway by the grace of God without incident.
4. Took out both passenger doors on my 1 month old Intrepid R/T when I grazed a phone pole…Then tried fixing it myself.

I’m sure I can think up more, but there’s a start, can you top it?

Now while I’m one of th emerry few who still believes that respect must be earned, it does not mean that I am discourteous. I am courteous until I am given a reason to be discourteous. This morning my gf and I decided to go to IHOP, we get there, are walking in, when the asshole in front of us looks back, sees us, and lets the door shut. Guy just held it for his family, no reason he couldnt have held it long enough for me to grab it.

Tonight I’m at a local bar. Theyve got a barback running around picking up empty drinks. Guy grabs mine before I’m done with it, it’s a double and there was at least 1/3 left. So I go catch up with him, get his attention, and tell him (shouting due to the band playing) “NEXT TIME YOU TAKE SOMEONES DRINK MAKE SURE THEYRE DONE WITH IT FIRST.” He responds “Ok, I will” and that is that. But no, this bald fuck next to me decides to butt in, tell me to calm down, that its a Saturday night and everyone is trying to have a good time, that I should’nt take it so seriously.

WHAT THE FUCK? Part of being courteous, is minding your own fucking business. Responses ran through my mind then I finally got him to lean in “Do you hear the loud band playing?” “Yes” “Did you think for a moment that I could have been shouting so the guy could hear me over them? I’m not pissed off, just annoyed, mind your own business.” So the guy offers to buy me a drink and I walked off. The barback actually got me a new drink which was fine… but where is the simple damned courtesy? I said what I had to, the guy heard me, and I was turning to walk off. Keep your fucking mouth shut and drink your drink.

I can’t quite say I have ever seen a movie where afterwards, everyone had the same confused look on their face. Decided to see the movie “Stay” today to avoid the rain for a bit, I honestly think this movie is quite possibly the biggest mind-fuck I’ve seen yet. The movie opens up with Henry, a disturbed college student recovering from a violent car accident where his mother and father were killed, showing up to find that his usual shrink isn’t there. Instead, Sam, played by Ewan MacGregor is there, and after Henry reveals his decision to commit suicide, makes it his mission to help Henry. Sounds simple enough, but then things get weird… Time loops, Henry can predict the future, and people thought to be dead seemingly are not. The acting makes the best of the plot which for lack of a better description is completely off its fucking rocker. It almost seems like an M Night Shamalayan type film, only his are actually easy to follow and don’t confuse the viewer much. The twist at the end really isn’t all that groundbreaking, it makes an attempt to satisfy the curiosity and cure the confusion, but fails thoroughly. Feel free to check it out, but I’d recommend waiting a few months and renting it, so you can watch if a few times like I will to see if this movie was really brilliant or still just a confusing failure.