Touched by a birdshit…

Well I had no plans tonight besides hopefully running into some familiar faces… Headed down to the Inn, doing 40mph through Glenwood, NJ and I hear/feel a splat. One of our feathered friends decided to make a deposit and it managed to nail me and my doorframe in one shit. Shot. You get it. Good luck, right? My car smells like bird shit and I feel all skeevy.

So good luck, right? I stop at the gas station in Pine Island to get a lottery ticket. As I’m walking in I see someone that looks familiar (from the back, not too many people with mullets anymore) heading over to a big U-Haul truck. I don’t think twice about it, go in, fill out 4 games, and head back out… Only to be blocked in my the box truck. Who is it? NONE OTHER THAN MY EX AND HER NEW HUBBY.

Holy shit, can we say bad timing? I got blown off tonight, shit on, as of right now my only plans are to sit here and play friggin video games… Did NOT need the icing on the cake to see yet another happy ex jaunting about. Sure, I’m happy for them, but they can still all drown in buckets.

YEA, I’M BITTER. Got a single? Congratulations, DIE.

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